3rd Mainland in 8

It took us 8 minutes to cross 3rd Mainland Bridge this morning.

It usually takes an hour.

I guess everyone else was queuing at a petrol station or was at home conserving what little they had, so there was just a handful of cars on the bridge at the time Benjamin and I zipped across on our last few drops of precious petrol.

At the traffic lights I saw a newspaper headline: “Federal Government reduces fuel price, reduces VAT”
Sh*t that meant the strike wouldn’t start tomorrow as planned. So much for my wish for a couple of days off work and escape from the manic Lagos traffic. I called a friend and told her the news.

“Sh*t” she said. (We think alike, that’s why we’re friends.)

The guys in my team were subdued when I got in. “Hi guys looks like there won’t be a strike!” I greeted. They grunted and barely looked up. I guess they were looking forward to a strike-induced holiday as well.

E refused to order chicken wings today because he’s waiting for the price to come down. He even harassed the chick who works at the joint across the street when she delivered someone else’s order, telling her “go back and tell your Manager that the Government has brought VAT back to 5% so chicken wings can’t remain at N630”

Everyone geared up to report to work tomorrow (Wednesday.) We weren’t looking forward to it because we were sure that by Thursday the traffic would be back - *groan* - since the petrol workers had called off their strike. (Note to confused readers: 2 strikes were in the pipeline: one called by the Labour Congress and the other by the petrol workers.)

I was worried about not having any petrol; all I’d have left after we got home would be about a teaspoon if any. Got home in a record 30 minutes or so, resigned to paying three times more for 'black market' from the guys who line up jerry cans of the stuff along the road.

I was really concerned about paying so much and ending up with petrol that had been mixed with kerosene or something but Benjamin claims he has a foolproof method of testing before buying. Something about a skin test. (Hey, as long as it’s not my skin being tested.)
He’s worked as a mechanic so I tend to go with what he says unless it sounds really silly. You could say I got two for the price of one - a driver and mechanic of some sort.

Showed me the certificate he got when he graduated from the mechanic workshop he trained at. According to the certificate, he is (and I quote) “a trained engineer” and “his absence from the workshop has left a vacuum no man can fill”. Whoever filled in the details of Benjamin’s certificate obviously lifted that line from somewhere, and I believe the ‘somewhere’ is an obituary.

On the way home we found some ‘black market’ to buy but it turned out I had left my wallet at home so the plan was for Benjamin to buy about 15 litres tomorrow.

Then on the 9 o’clock news it was announced that the Labour Congress decided the strike would go on. On, off, on off...the strike business is just like the power supply.

Apparently, the Government reverted to the old VAT of 5% in response to all the pressure but only went as far as reducing the pump price to N70/litre instead of the previous price of N65/litre.

The strike is going to cause even more hardship for the millions of people who live on daily earnings so on that note I really cannot support a strike that lasts longer than a couple of days.

However, truth is the selfish insensitive side of me cannot help but be pleased to have a day or two away from a crazy commute, demanding deadlines and overpriced chicken wings.